“Darkness Guide Me”
Welcome! Read on to learn about me, my writing, and what inspired the theme of my debut novel, Claimed By Darkness.
First off, hi! My name is S.R. Hartley, but you can call me Sheena. I mainly write adult dark romantasy/fantasy with spice, but I also enjoy occasionally writing paranormal romance and even contemporary romance. I’ve been writing since I was around 8 or 9 years old, and back then I wrote short stories and poetry and had a huge goal of becoming a published author one day. Guess what? The wild, crazy dream that little girl fantasized about is coming true! April 7th, 2026, my debut spicy romantasy will release into the world, and I cannot wait for you guys to read it. My publisher, City Owl Press, also snagged an audiobook deal for me with Tantor Audio, and I’m thrilled you’ll have the opportunity to listen to it as well. Claimed By Darkness is book one in a planned trilogy, so this is only the beginning of my author journey. I’m so excited for what’s to come!
I know as a reader myself, I’m always intrigued by what inspires authors to write their stories, so I thought I’d dive into what exactly inspired my debut. I’ll be as open, honest, and vulnerable as I can be, but some of these things are a little difficult to talk about because it involves allowing you into my head and heart, giving you a glimpse of my own struggles with “darkness.”
I think it’s safe to say that a majority of us struggle daily with mental health issues, whether it be anxiety, depression, ptsd, or something else. The list can go on, but those are the ones I personally have a lot of (too much) experience with. In 2023, I was struggling extra hard. The stress and pressure of being an RN in a busy hospital during the pandemic had finally calmed down. The chaos just vanished as if it never even happened. With that, I was finally calm enough to let it all sink in and to see and feel what a mess it all had made in my head. I was not okay. On top of that, I’ve always dealt with extreme anxiety and depression that comes and goes, but mostly just comes and stays… leaving me hanging on for dear life as I try my best to fight to see the light at the end of a very bleak, shadowy never-ending tunnel.
I sat down and wrote a letter to myself about how I felt. I felt I wasn’t enough for my family. I felt like a failure. I felt I should be doing more. I felt like no matter what I did I would always be drowning in this pit of darkness that refused to just let me go or let me breathe. If you struggle yourself, you know exactly what I mean, how even on the good days you feel it there… always hovering, always waiting for your most vulnerable moment to strike, ruining any moment of peace you might get because you know from experience that the peace won’t last nearly long enough, even when it does come. I opened up my heart and let out all the pain, all the truth that I’d been holding onto for years when I wrote that letter. It said many things, but the ones that stood out were, “I’m never going to escape it. It won’t let me. It’s grip on me is too strong. It won’t stop until there’s nothing left for it to take from me.” But… I decided then that I can continue to fight. I can continue to hope for better days. I can refuse to give up and let it win, even on the worst days. My story was born from these thoughts; from these painfully beautiful words that I spilled onto the page, from my cry for help to myself to fight another day. Darkness would not claim me. I refused to let it.
Claimed By Darkness became a way for me to release my own darkness and pain; to allow myself to feel the rage and sadness that washes over me when I think of all the others who struggle the same way I have… the same way I still do. Expressing it through fictional characters and words that are theirs and not my own felt freeing somehow, though, if I’m being honest, some of those words are straight from me. Chapter 3 has quite a few bits from the actual letter to myself I mentioned writing that inspired this story, just because they fit so well and were so meaningful and important to me. It was a way to show others who might feel that darkness tugging at their mind, always, that at least they aren’t alone.
Yes, I struggle. Yes, my MMC struggles with depression in Claimed By Darkness. I wrote her story this way because I truly believe that anyone who struggles has a chance to be free from it. I believe there is hope for us all. I wanted to show a character who makes it out in the end. Someone who faces darkness head on and says, “I’m stronger than you. I will not let you win.” There’s a bit of me in her, and a bit of you, too. Her story from book one to book three will show how powerful light is against darkness, and how that light can be wielded against it no matter how powerful or suffocating it might be. Light will always conquer darkness in the end. Hope will always overshadow despair. We only have to open our eyes to the truth… we are in control. We can’t let the darkness win.
In the words of the characters in my story, “Darkness guide me. Angel save me.” Meaning: Follow the darkness so you have the upper hand, so it can’t haunt or consume you. Eventually you will find your way into the light.
xoxo,
Sheena